You’re halfway through a hectic week. You’ve gotten through church service Sunday morning and the prep work for the week, tackled Monday’s work schedule and errands, and made it through Tuesday’s social activities and even fit in a work out. I don’t know about you, but I’m tired. There is a tub of stuff by the front door that needs to go to the consignment thrift store, egg rolls to make for life group, and three different extracurricular activities that overlap. I need help!!
Why does it feel bad to even type that out? Is it because we compare ourselves to all the women we feel are doing “it all” (what even is that elusive “it all”?!) and feel we don’t measure up? Do you struggle with feeling guilty or weak like I do when I feel I can’t do it all by myself and have to ask for or accept help??
Accepting Help is a Strength
Accepting help does not make you weak! As a follower of my savior Jesus, I have to consistently remind myself that being what society thinks of as weak is ok. I am in this world but not of it, and don’t conform to this world’s definition of strong or weak. My God gives me all the strength I need for the glory of His name. Accepting help is actually a strength in a believer’s life. It is a way God bonds believers together as family. Admitting that you can’t do it all and therefore accepting help is a powerful tool that helps defeat pride. Pride that the enemy can use in an attempt to isolate us in times of need.
Accepting Help Does Not Make You Less Than
The enemy also uses this extremely dangerous trap called comparison. It’s one of his favorites for women especially! You compare yourself to the thin, fashionable mom; to the successful breastfeeding mom; to the volunteer stay-at-home mom. It’s such an easy thing to! But guess what? You are precious just the way you are. Our value is not defined by what we accomplish through the weak or how busy we are (my fam even has a battle plan against busyness). The creator of the universe has a predestined purpose for your life because you are His. Don’t let the enemy use comparison to make you feel less worthy because you can’t do everything, be everything, or handle everything. No one else can either. Promise.
Accepting Help Strengthens Relationships
Think about the last time you helped someone. That good feeling you get when helping someone else is God orchestrated. My daughter walks a visually impaired friend to his classes everyday. Why? Because he needs help? Well, yeah – but no. They’re friends and that’s what friends do. She likes him and enjoys his company and knows he needs help so she is more than happy to provide that assistance. It’s a way she shows her friendship. It is hard wired in us to help others. Why would we deny a friend or family member the opportunity to help us? Sometimes we are the helper and sometimes we are the one in need of some help. Even though it feels better to be helping someone else rather than the one that needs help, I try to remind myself that it strengthens relationships no matter what side of the court I’m on.
Accepting Help is a Must in Today’s Society
Today’s society is so much different than even less than 100 years ago. Women used to mainly be homemakers taking care of a house, husband and multiple children. Today, we not only have many more women with full time careers outside the home but also school parent teacher organizations, competitive youth sports, more social engagements, and a much longer list of to-dos and errands to run. The invention of the automobile, the smart phone, and the women’s liberation movement in the 1960s…all these brought about massive changes for women. We as women have added much more to our schedules in today’s world. Maybe we’re not really meant to do everything on our own.
Needing help is not really an option. There are too many things to handle in today’s world for it to even be a possibility. We’re not even wired to do it all by ourselves. Trying doesn’t make you strong. Accepting help does not make you weak. By the way, my mom took my tub to the thrift store and helped me make egg rolls. My hubs split duties with me and we said no to one activity. So, next time you (through strength and wisdom and need) accept help, drop me a note in the comments and let’s celebrate together! Virtual cake for all!!