As a believer our core purpose on earth is to give glory to God through the life that we live. One of the major ways we do that is LOVE. The Bible mentions love so many times and the command to love is given eleven different times in the New Testament. Jesus told the lawyer that the most important commandment is to love God with all your heart and mind and soul and to love your neighbor as yourself. Your way of love will give glory to the God most high.
And what is more intimate than the relationship of love is with our husbands? It is the most raw, exposed, real exposure of how we love. It is also the most time consuming, energy required task of love we take on. But what about our children you say? Our marriage is even more a work of love than that with our children because we don’t teach, shape, mold our husbands. They have already been molded by their parents and their personalities for the main part are already formed. This can make the love of marriage more challenging than the love of children.
So obviously loving your man should be centered around Christ and give glory to God. The way you love your husband will be God’s love for you overflowing and pouring out. How do we put this into practice and what practical steps can we take to make our marriage centered around Christ?
Pray for your husband
I want to encourage you to pray for your husband on a daily basis. This is one of the most loving things you can do for your husband. Lift him up to God and hand him over. You are asking the most powerful to care for your man. Pray for all areas of his life. Maybe he needs prayer against distractions. Don’t we all lol? Side note, I have to fight distraction in my prayer life. I think everyone does though. What helps me is if I pray during the same time each day – like while in the shower or eating breakfast, driving to and from work, etc.
Pray for him at work. Does he need strength, wisdom, discernment? Is there a specific situation at work that you need to lift up and ask God to guide your man through? Pray for his spiritual life, that God would draw him closer to Himself, soften his heart, give him a desire to grow spiritually. Pray for God to put other men in his path that would mentor and encourage him in his walk with God. Pray for him from head to toe! Sharon Jaynes has a really cool prayer card for praying for your husband head to toe. It helps me focus and gives me prayer ideas that I wouldn’t have thought of on my own.
Another word similar to honor would be respect. How do we show our husbands honor and respect to give glory to God and center our marriage around Christ? Admiring your husband and treating him as an important leader in your family can be hard for many women. Our dads used to dote on us and treat us like we were princesses. We were Daddy’s little girl! We pretty much got whatever we wanted.
Our fathers were in charge of us though. My dad was in charge. He was the adult. He was training me. My husband on the other hand is the same age and does not control me like a parent does a child. However, this can cause issues with revering your husband as the leader of your family. Does this mean you do everything he says? No! But it means you don’t belittle him. Honor is the opposite of belittling. Hold his opinions high, trust that he has wisdom and knows what he’s talking about. Trust his intelligence and value his individual opinion even when it differs from yours. Show him that he’s important to you. This is biblical love.
“With all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.”Ephesians 4:2-3
The Bible teaches us to mourn with those who mourn and rejoice with those who are rejoicing (Romans 12:15). This is empathy. Sympathy is understanding how someone feels. Empathy is feeling with them. Practice feeling WITH your husband. Empathy is a learned behavior so it takes practice. Don’t get frustrated and give up. Don’t expect perfection and put an impossible standard on yourself.
Many times I struggle to understand why my husband is reacting to circumstances the way he does. After all, men and women are wired different. If something angers him, I try to imagine it happening to myself. Really strive to see your husband’s perspective and understand the emotions behind the situation. Be there for him in love. Loving your husband in empathy is centered around Christ’s love for us and gives glory to God.
Don’t go getting all defensive on me. I didn’t say slave. I said serve. A Christ centered marriage is undoubtedly centered around service. To love one is to serve one. It’s actually pretty simple. Do things for your husband!
Make a home for him. Sorry, this includes some cleaning. Serve him food. This includes cooking more than hot pockets (spaghetti is a good upgrade! 😉 ). Show him he is important by doing things for him that he holds important. My husband wants clean laundry and clean dishes. Drawer organization not so much. So I will strive to give him clean laundry and clean dishes even if my drawers make me twitch a little bit. It’s a way that I can serve my husband and give glory to God.
Loving like Christ for Christ
Ultimately we are living life to give glory to the God Most High. It is all for Him that you are centering your marriage around Christ. And we are not left to our own strength to do all this. Christ gave himself up to pay the price for our sins and sent the Holy Spirit to help us live out a life centered around Him. He loves you dearly and wants to help you be a wonderful wife to your man.
With all the love!
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