Giving His Grumpy Some Grace
My man was….GRUMMM-PY…He’d had a hard day of work at the hospital, hadn’t eaten all day, came home to a messy house because the kids are home for the summer, and not only did they make a mess but they also broke my $70 digital drawing pen fighting over whose turn it was. He was not happy! Side note – isn’t it great to have a man that gets angry when you’ve been wronged! Anyway, the day moved on as they always do but things were less than peachy.
However, knowing all of these were underlying causes of the mood made it easier to deal with. I gave him his space. I didn’t react defensively to little nitpicks or a harsh tone. I’ve learned a few rules for fighting over the past two decades lol! I know my man. He has amazing character and a good heart. Now what I wanted to say was a totally different! 😉 The words still stung, but I had to let the comments go (read about handling hurt here). Loved ones take on a little bit of the collateral damage when we’re stressed. That’s just the way relationships are.
We opted to eat buffet because I knew if I could feed him, I could fix the hangry. At home he fell asleep on the couch and we all let him sleep in a quiet, peaceful environment (which is a massive task with 4 kids!) with lights out and screens off. We all went to bed early. By the next morning, we had all recovered!
Grace Battles the Grump
We all have our hard, irritating days. We all get into grumpy moods. I don’t know about your house, but a sour mood can spread through our house like wildfire, and with six people it’s miserable! Giving grace allows us to deter our own anger and defend against resentment. And what would an angry reaction do to his grumpy mood? I can tell you one thing, it wouldn’t diffuse it like undeserved kindness (grace) would.
Grace as Testimony
Our husbands will make us mad or hurt our feelings. It’s a given. When we are able to offer grace, God gives us peace and strengthens us. This speaks testimony to our husbands. Though we didn’t deserve it (trust me! I didn’t deserve it! Just read my testimony!), God gave His love and only Son for our sins (Thank! You! God!!). Undeserved mercy and grace is irrational in the eyes of the world and a sign that we are different than most. Undeserved love mirrors God.
Matthew 5 says,
14You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. 15Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. 16In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.
You are being obedient to your Maker when you’re gracious to your grumpy Mister. Though we won’t puff up in pride, it feels good to be obedient and filled with love for your ultimate Love when you do something that you know pleases Him.
Colossians 4 says,
6Let your speech always be gracious, filled with salt, so that you may know how to answer each person.
Encouragement to Give Grumpy Grace
So next time your Mr. takes on a grumpy face, let me encourage you to look for underlying reasons to make it easier to empathize. Look for ways to ease the grump without coming across as trying to “fix him” and, possibly the hardest of all, practice obedience to God through undeserved kindness (grace) in your words, expressions, tone, and actions.
2 Timothy 1:7
For the Spirit of God does not make us timid, but gives us power, love, and self-discipline.
Hang in there. The grump will end! 😉 Grace & Encouragement friend!